A Glimpse of the Mountain

Here is the next of my journal entries:

"March 13th, 2008
A lot has happenned over the past week - so much so that I'm feeling burnt out. A few prayers have been answered, and so many more spoken. Firstly, and easily, Aaron's heart on this issue soon followed my own. We've decided to adopt right now - that is to get started on it right now. I've been researching and emailing, gathering as much information as I can. Anytime my mind is quieted - which is basically when I'm lying in bed at night - my thoughts become consumed with this and I can't sleep. Not good. But these times have also included times with God. A few nights ago I asked Him if this is really what He wants us to do, or if this is just what I want. He answered me immediately - that it is what He has had planned. It was so clear. These past few days I have already needed to cling to that. The more I find out about the whole process and costs, the higher the mountain seems. I know that He will bless our obedience - and that this will only happen through Him. I'm feeling drained and discouraged and we've only barely begun. I wish I could jump past all this to the end where I get to look back and see how faithful God was in making the pieces fall into place and bringing us through. I find it very hard to take blind steps trusting that I will land on solid ground - especially when it comes to our finances. I think I will just make it my daily goal to trust Him in this each new day. I know this will be a time of growth for me, and be a testimony of God's faithfulness that I will be able to share with my children as they age. I am thankful, and I certainly anticipate the arrival of the children He has for us."